I suppose I have always been a writer. When I was a little girl, I filled my journal with pretend cursive. In sixth grade I won second place in a writing competition. In middle school, I started to play with poetry and short stories that I showed only my closest friends. In high school, I had a few things published in the yearly magazine of sorts. I have even written a few songs….don’t worry, I won’t unleash those on you.
I have never considered it a hobby. I never considered it a possible occupation beyond a brief interest in journalism in college while I was majoring in music performance. I did consider it something I did. Like how I bite my nails while in deep thought. Like how I sing without realizing it and how I laugh the loudest and talk the most.
I suppose writing is still something that I just do.
Tonight I will be attending The New Citizens Press 10 Year Anniversary Celebration. I will be attending as a writer. It will be the little words italicized under my name. To be honest, I’m a little anxious about that idea.
It takes courage to try; to attempt to be who you want to be. It also takes a willingness to step over your own self doubt.
I don’t know if you have noticed but I am constantly preaching to all of you to seek, find and embrace the best of who you are. Those mini sermons are for myself too. I am brave. I am fearless. I am worthy. Sometimes I am unsure if all of those things are true or if they even matter.
All week I have been thinking about why I deserve to be recognized as a writer. Who am I anyway? It’s not like I’ve written a book or earned a paycheck worthy of celebrating for what I do. I’m no…well, any kind of college major degree holder. What does this even mean to be recognized as a writer?
It means simply that it’s what I do. It means that people reading my words find me. They find me at the bottom of a list of things they can relate to. They find me holding a piece of the world they want to know about. They find me laughing at my own folly or raging at my own past. I am making all of the same kind of discoveries.
I’ll get all dolled up and be who I am.
It’s kind of what I do.