Hunting Season has begun.
I am not a hunter but I have been contemplating a search for some time.
I am looking for a new church. I have been through a lot in the past two years and it has changed me quite a bit. The grooves in my map have shifted off of the main roads and have meandered down barely marked paths. My spirit feels much like the plates of the earth; moving and shifting to accommodate growth, pressure and sinking.
My faith in You remains but my idea of who You are and what You want has changed. I have attended church accepting that I would not always agree with what was being taught but I would at minimum agree with the main point. Today, after all I feel I know now, that doesn’t seem to be enough.
I want more than the main point. I want to pray in agreement.
This may sound like an illusion and maybe it is. Maybe I will be like an old friend that declared that he belonged to all churches that shared our faith and decided to move through many communities.
I do things all or nothing. I buy in. Everything I do is with fervor and faith.
Why would I expect that you created me to treat my faith community any differently?
I think You know what I need and I am going to trust that You will help me find it. Even if this hunting trip starts and ends without a prize. I have learned not to fear the journey, the seeking and the remembering. I just ask that You help my boys find what they need to. No mother worships alone.
At least I don’t have to wear orange or sit in the cold to take this trip.
If I do this right,I suspect that I will enjoy more color and more warmth than ever.
PS – I’d love to hear your thoughts if you have ever searched for a new house of worship or if you’d like to recommend a place for me to try. Leave a comment below!
PPS – I’d like to reiterate that this change is a reflection of my spirit and not a reflection on the churches I have attended in the past couple of years. Just in case someone out there is having hurt feelings.